The word "gentleman" evokes images of a man who opens vehicle doors, pulls out chairs, carries heavy items and is always willing to pay when out with a lady. This appears to be out of current in today's world and goes against the feminist movement. Does this, however, imply that men should disregard tradition, values, and etiquette?
It's crucial to analyse what it means to be a gentleman in today's world, especially in the age of political correctness. Keep in mind that being a "gentleman" does not mean opening the door for a woman or offering to walk with her on the street side of the sidewalk. Instead, think on how to treat everyone, male or woman, with respect, consideration, and sincerity.
The primary priority of any gentleman should be to make anyone feel at ease, regardless of who they are, their history, their life, the circumstances, or anything else.
We surely have plenty of examples of how things have evolved in the previous 20 years and even further back. In essence, the aim of delivering comfort hasn't changed; it's just been tweaked to better fit a broader and more diversified audience. We now have considerably greater (but far from ideal) gender equality, a workforce that is no longer defined by age or decades of experience, so providing comfort to others demands more adaptability and consideration.
Gentlemen's etiquette is frequently misinterpreted as flirting. If that's your goal, it'll be obvious, and it may help you court your next relationship by displaying a more refined side of yourself, but if it's not in this case, you'll be found out. Manners are about sincere intentions backed up by actions; it can't be a show-and-tell routine since you'll make a mistake sooner or later. Gentlemen behaviour can also be taken as patronising, more so in a social setting.
Psychologists discovered that a pleasant or chivalrous approach might disguise chauvinistic and patronising attitudes,because some men may still consider females as helpless beings in need of their care. This particularly comes under “benevolent sexism” and is more difficult to detect than the aggressive form born through open hostility.Benevolent sexism is a wolf in sheep's clothing that encourages women to endorse gender inequality on an interpersonal basis because sexism appears to be welcome, pleasant, and harmless, these seemingly good-faith efforts may persuade women to accept the existing quo in society.
That being said we cannot assume that every male who behaves well has a sexist motive. It's about being courteous and the world needs more of that. In the day-to-day grind, it's the little things that count and can bring a smile to your face. It's fantastic to be a gentleman but it's a mistake to assume that women seek traditional relationships. Some women prefer it when a man opens doors, pays for everything, and so on. Many do not. The element that is sexist is denying women a choice and having specific "expectations" just because of gender.
Everyone should be encouraged, regardless of gender, to conduct such chivalrous acts. Just to be nice, pay for your friend's supper or help bring your neighbor's goods inside. It's about having compassion for people and treating them with dignity. It's all about doing small things to improve the lives of others around you a bit simpler.
Chivalry and Politeness have no gender.
Written By- Kanak Verma
Graphics By- Anshika Mittal
Ideation- Saniya S Pendse
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